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Reasons to get back with ex girlfriend

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Never has a breakup occurred without some sort of rift, no matter how maturely you've worked through it since then. However, sometimes the reason your ex is an ex is entirely fixable. Maybe the timing was off, one of you needed to grow, or you needed perspective on the relationship—but overall, the two of you go together like peanut butter and jelly, mac and cheese, or Tom and Gisele. Well, maybe. If those intense miss-your-ex vibes have started to creep into your brain, hold up a second before acting on those feelings. We asked a couples experts to break down the million-dollar question: When might getting back together with an ex actually work?

SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: How To Get Your Ex Back (Follow These 8 Steps!)

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Is My Ex Right For Me? Should We Get Back Together?

10 Reasons You Keep Getting Back Together With Your Ex

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Ah, the power of the ex. Probably not. The appeal is real It's not really your fault: While you probably broke up for a very legit reason, your desire to rekindle an old flame is pretty normal. And let's face it: Getting back together with an ex is just easier than spending hours swiping through Bumble and going on craptastic dates. Here's how to get back with your ex without making a total mess of it. I know, I know. The texts! The dinners! The sex! It's all very exciting that you and your ex are hanging again.

But before you go posting couples shots all over Insta and jumping right back into double dates with their parents, take a sec to chill.

Because you need time to She recommends asking yourself what your expectations are in a relationship, as well as what qualities you need from a partner. Was there something major missing before that your partner could actually fulfill this time around?

That's an important Q to be able to answer before reconciling. For example, did you feel like they took you for granted last time? Didn't know how to speak your love language? That's all fixable on take two. But if you felt like they didn't quite match up in terms of goals and values, that's a different story.

Perhaps you're super ambitious and they're A-okay working at their dad's company with no plans of moving up or taking it over someday—that's likely not going to change tomorrow.

Be open and honest. That said, "it's impossible to have a truly fresh start with someone you've already dated," notes WH advisor "Dr. Chloe" Carmichael , PhD, a clinical psychologist and author of Dr. Chloe's 10 Commandments of Dating. When getting back together with an ex, you need to do everything you can to separate fact from fiction and the past from the present.

Ask yourself if some of the beliefs you have about this person are based on the behavior and statements they're making to you now, versus who they were when you initially started dating and things were good. So check yourself: Is it your mind telling you that this person is your rock-solid?

Is that thought based on what has actually happened in the relationship or are you letting what you want things to be like overshadow how things actually were? If you're having trouble sussing this out, Dr. Chloe suggests try making a timeline of your past relationship, highlighting significant events—both good and bad.

This exercise helps you see what your 'ship was actually like versus your brain's fantasy of it, and can help you pinpoint times when your ex didn't live up to the image you've made yourself believe. Remember, settling is still settling, even if it's with someone you've loved before. You could get back with an ex These celebs did just that:.

You know that little ball of doubt in the pit of your stomach? It's there for a reason Note that if your ex is quick to sweep old issues under the rug, "that's probably not a good start," says Dr. Feelings need to be validated—even if the other party doesn't agree with them. And trust, once it's broken, is very hard to rebuild. Let's say your ex cheated on you, physically or emotionally. You have to be truly willing to give them another chance, says Dr.

Chloe—otherwise you'll end up crucifying them for the past every time you get upset. You know what I mean: They forget to call you back, you go on a downward spiral thinking about what they could be doing, then throw their past transgressions in their face when they ask why you're annoyed.

Chloe explains. Keep in mind that forgiveness is a process, and if you're struggling to move forward with it while being with your ex, you may want to hold off for a bit. If you do notice ghosts from you past relationship coming up, it's best not to speak about them the moment they pop into your head, says Dr.

This makes it all too easy for impulsive and unhelpful arguments to creep up on the reg. It's much, much better to write in a journal or talk to a friend until you have your thoughts together enough to have something constructive to discuss.

Always speak up about your feelings, but know that people respond best when it's done in a thoughtful and organized manner.

I understand your concerns and appreciate you telling me. You can also fill them in on your plan moving forward, and keep them looped in along the way.

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Why Would You Ever Want To Get Back With Your Ex

In a perfect world, a breakup would be quick, easy and painless. You and your ex would mutually decide to go your separate ways, and you both would move on to find someone else who is more compatible with you. You would both just take the good things you learned during the relationship and that would be it. Many times, a breakup can trigger something inside of you that makes you instantly realize that parting with your ex was a huge mistake. Maybe you broke up with him over something petty, or perhaps it was just bad timing when the two of you started your relationship.

Ah, the power of the ex. Probably not.

Dating can be full of surprises and you can suddenly find yourself dating people you never expected to — including an ex. Even though there are some exes you probably never want to see again, there are probably others you still have a soft spot for and would be willing to give the relationship another chance. But why? What is the psychology behind getting back together with an ex?

5 Actually Legit Reasons To Get Back Together With An Ex

Justin and Selena dated on and off for years. Kylie dumped Tyga, then took him back. And in a recent survey by the app Wishbone , the exact same portion of users — 44 percent — said they had or would get back with an ex. If you've ever gone through a bad breakup, there's a chance that one special person keeps tugging at your heartstrings. It can feel impossible to let them go. There's no hard and fast rule about whether dating an ex is a bad idea — sometimes, the second or third, or fourth attempt at a relationship works, while other times, it explodes and leaves you more hurt than ever. Your age.

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The secret of how to get back together with your ex basically comes down to the following three things. Have you switched your focus to begin making her have feelings for you, feelings like respect, attraction and love? Have you actually been doing that? So, if you want her back, you must switch your focus to actively make her have feelings for you again. What is going to make her have feelings for you again is when you stop saying and doing the types of things that have been turning her off, the types of things that have led to the breakup, and that have caused her to feel less respect, attraction, and love for you after the breakup.

Is it crazy to try and get back together?

No matter how devastated you feel when a relationship ends, indulging in the idea of a way more successful round two cue heart-eyed emojis and the better-than-ever Miley and Liam , is generally not a good idea. That said, there are plenty of couples who do reunite for the long haul and end up with a partnership that's healthier and happier than their OG relationship. To follow in the footsteps of fairytale reunions like William and Kate's and avoid anything reminiscent of Kourtney and Scott's on-again-off-again fiascos Lundquist says the first thing to do is take a cold hard look at why it ended.

The Only 3 Reasons You Should Ever Get Back Together With An Ex

By Chris Seiter. If it happened recently, you are probably still shell shocked after what went down. You are likely feeling angry, confused, and rejected.

Why would anyone want to get their ex back? Why would you want to take back someone who walked out on you? Why would you want to start a relationship that already ran its course? These are all legitimate questions that some people have about reconciliation. But not those who do want to get their ex back. They have a very simple answer to all these questions.

6 Women Reveal Their Reasons To Get Back With An Ex, Proving That Everyone Is Different

Breaking up with someone isn't always an easy decision. Usually, there are a lot of emotions involved, and maybe even some doubts about whether to even go through with it. But, after you've broken up, you may be tempted to get back together. And obviously, that's your choice. But, these stories from women revealing the reasons to get back with an ex are totally relatable, heartbreaking, and sometimes, perfectly adorable. Every situation is different, so there's really no one-size-fits-all way of knowing whether or not you should get back with your ex, other than to figure out how you feel about it. However, if you're looking for some input on the matter, these stories from real women about what happened when they got back with their exes might help you decide what to do. Honestly, sometimes it works out, but sometimes it doesn't.

Jul 11, - You and your ex would mutually decide to go your separate ways, and you both 15 Reasons Why You Should Get Back With Your Ex to be more settled in your career before you're able to really be the best girlfriend.

The answer to the question 'can i get my girlfriend back? You see if your girl still loves you, no matter how much you've messed up in the past, she will more than likely be receptive to you if you can prove to her that she won't be wasting her time and that she won't get hurt again. No one wants to be hurt and no one wants to set themselves up to be hurt by trusting someone who has already proven they can't be trusted.

The Only 4 Reasons to Get Back Together with Your Ex

By Chris Seiter. For those of you who are new to this website then I want you to think of this like the ultimate resource for getting your ex girlfriend back. My goal with this site is to create a resource so powerful that it can literally answer every single question you have about getting your girlfriend back.

Be sure to watch the video above all the way through and then read this article all the way to the end. Knowing the dynamics of human nature that cause an ex to want to get back together with someone after they broke up with them is fundamental to my relationship coaching. If you handled the breakup poorly by trying to talk your ex into getting back together , you likely tried to make them feel guilty about how they hurt you by breaking up with you. If you did that, they might come back to you because they are trying to ease the guilt they feel.

Let a bit of time pass post breakup.

When you first broke up, you may have never thought you'd consider getting back together — or maybe you did. But if you're now wondering, "Should I get back with my ex? For example, Justin Bieber got engaged to his then-ex and now-wife Hailey Baldwin Bieber after they'd broken up and dated other people. And their history was likely part of the reason they were almost instantly engaged once they got back together.

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